being

a life that leaves,
a sign of pain.
a life she berieves.
a sign to remain.

a love for one.
a future is struck.
a love is undone.
a future turns dusk.

a new beginning.
a shredding sorrow.
a new undoing.
a tearful morrow.

Memorial Day in memoriam

whose guilt will call,
for justice to fall?

for brothers in arms,
embraced by war's harms;

slaves who have bled,
diamonds stained red.

for animals' skin,
now haute couture sin.

oceans' whispering breath,
screams of imminent death.

for those who resist
swastika'd communist.

Tibetan monk's chant,
red sickle has stamp't.

for The People's blind trust,
raped by dictator's lust.

Muslim pride shorn,
Jewish life torn....

for child's ray of smile,
perversion turned vile.

ideals who've fallen,
ill and forgotten.

for whom should bells toll,
if not for us all?

poison

she flirts with the rain,
deciding her pain.
she fights it in vain.
her ordeal's just started.

she's lost and ungarded.
her fight is halfhearted.
has her spirit departed?
it's never the same...

her trusted refrain,
in truth and in name.
what poisons her brain?
it ends as it started.

love's death: a sonnet

eternal eyes,

goddess hair,

longing stare,

sorrow belies.

wistful guise.

failing care.

resigned despair,

mortal lies.

arcane lips,

lost face.

blood drips,

love's trace.

life's eclipse,

finally chaste.

numbers that pass/the passing of numbers (incomplete)

atone for a day's deed?
not on three hours of sleep.

upon my wrist a new scar;
I laugh as I think I've made it this far.

I planned, I thought my death,
A troubled life, one last breath.

From May, through fall

ONE

from May, from May,
from one, may two.
from Spring of May,
may love spring through.

TWO

through Fall, through Fall,
through love, be true.
through eve of Fall,
falls love for you.

as i read Jane Eyre again

i reach the part where mental illness is referenced as ¡lunacy! ¡depravity ¡madness! Brontë's writing consumes me, but in doing so soothes, for no longer is mental illness defined as lunacy, depravity, madness.

amor ilumina, amor conjura

amor, cara ilumina.
ojos sedientos, fascina.

piel, sol, desnuda.
roce, beso da.

voz gentil, caricia.
corazón, travesura inicia.

fluyendo, sangre, locura.
amor, recuerdo, conjura.

virtually on the verge of vomiting

virtually on the verge of vomiting, i push myself yet again, DJ's Sisma and Vekta driving me hard atop the range of the sliding decibel control, spinning their seduction, averting hallucination, inducing hallucination--for how else can i still be on this endlessly-moving carpet of vulcanized rubber passing under my beaten you-know-whats, at an indicated 8 miles-per-hour.


this, after having subjected myself to implements of torture painted an airy, aseptic white, corners coronated by stainless steel to prevent the corrosion-inducing sweat and tears shed during these BDSM sessions, while tied to ligatures of 1/4 inch 7 x 19 MIL-DTL-83420M cables terminated by 10-pound chunks of recycled slag, shaped ingot-like, potential energy tortuously converted to kinetic--energy is neither destroyed nor created (or is it mass?--although i feel as if my mass has been destroyed, mutilated...)


stop i do not. i keep control, avert nausea, meet and greet Limit, my old camarada, who like i has changed, become more inscrutable, prone to abrupt shifts in presence, mind, disposition.


"adios, tia. me voy, dejo tu abu-grhahib, tu house of pain, tu facility of torture, tu medieval dungeon, el discretely-mail-ordered-from-back-page-advert-in-almanac-format-photo-journal-of-alternative-sexually-arousing-practices-implement-of-pleasure-equipped suburban basement you habitate; i am in desperate need of a carbohydrate bolus."


as i make my way up the stairs, i turn, look down, weakly smile. i know, Limit knows, i will return. and i so wish she has her friend Enlightenment over for an as-as-always-too-brief visit.




virtva llyin the verg aknabac firnate ogiti hiyrbak if akterbauve