snap

i disavow.
relinquish now.

outside disturbance,
mental perturbance.

joy, fear...
...end near?

live life?
end strife?

prisoner of self

for who am i to say what i do, or do what i say

Reena

You keep me comin' home again
You keep me comin' home again
When you were gone,
I met a friend

She taught me how to
Live in the end
Are her eyes
Brown or blue?

How does she keep her
Static cool
My heart and soul
Are rocked up in her eyes
A little blink I recognize
A little blink, yea, that's my prize

A white horse
Sittin right there by her side
Hard to ignore
Hard to disguise
She'll never ever
Realize...

You keep me comin' home again
You keep me comin' home again
When you were gone
I was out of my mind

I had a friend who laughed all the time
I had a friend who cried all the time
I had a friend who screamed all the time
I had a friend who lied all the time

i hear my struggle in this Sonic Youth song

regardless of other interpretations or references

i sit for hours, listen to this song again, again, again...

synaesthesia

¿do you experience sensations normally sensed separately, coupled together?

¿colors when you hear or read words?
¿tastes, smells, shapes or touches in almost any combination?
¿numbers, days, months as personalities?
¿numbers, months, days as locations in space?

terms

i...

...cowered, did not “come out of the darkness” as Dream says.

...saw you post comments, did not respond.

...was mixed, did not break out.

...surprisingly believe no major damage resulted.

...thankfully report meds prevented a more violent mix.

...consider mixed to be detestable.

...appear to be more than bipolar II.

...may be further diagnosed with paranoid personality disorder.

...should extend my medical cocktail accordingly.

...am back, i believe; this time anyway.

...thank you for not forgetting.